To: Brock Turner’s father, From: A Stanford mother and murder victim

Hi Dan,

I feel compelled to write to you after reading your pathetic letter in opposition to your son’s measly sentencing of six months in jail. “What I know as his father is that incarceration is not the appropriate punishment for Brock,” demonstrates your complete lack of empathy and horrific parenting skills. Nowhere in this letter do you admit to any of your son’s wrongdoing and in fact you minimize a violent, traumatic experience that will haunt the victim for the rest of her life. Your letter hit close to home for two reasons: 1) I have a daughter and two sons, one of whom graduated from Stanford, and 2) Like your son’s victim, I too have been dragged through a needlessly long trial after the murder of my late husband. His death will affect our family for the rest of our lives, and no amount of jail time for the perpetrator can change the devastation; however, his and his family’s lack of remorse is what is noteworthy – just like yours. 

After reading your response, it’s quite apparent that the apple hasn’t fallen far from the tree. By writing your letter, it is evident that you’ve likely contributed to Brock becoming a self-centered monster. Your equating Brock’s brutalizing of an innocent woman to “20 minutes of action” is appalling. Why not just say, “Boys will be boys”? 

I’m sorry that your son doesn’t get excited about eating a steak anymore. If either of my sons took advantage of a helpless girl, I’d probably knock out their teeth so they’d never chew on anything other than scrambled eggs. 

Your statement that Brock is “…totally committed to educating other college age students about the dangers of alcohol consumption and sexual promiscuity” suggests that you believe the problem was that your son and the victim just drank and fooled around a bit too much. I have a son who consumed plenty of alcohol at Stanford and although he never took Brock’s substance abuse course, he managed to graduate without ever having raped someone.

Your son isn’t happy-go-lucky anymore? Have you read the victim’s letter about what her life has been like since your son’s digital penetration? It doesn’t sound like she's in the best of spirits either. The difference is that she didn’t ask for this whereas Brock did. Perhaps instead of justifying Brock’s actions, you might’ve suggested some form of treatment for anger management and violence prevention. It’s actually scary that you can't see your part in enabling or condoning his behavior. 

Entitled people like yourself and Brock have also victimized my family. The murderer, who robbed my children of their father, received the undying support of his family during the several years prior to and during his trial. His mother and sister managed to round up thousands of dollars to provide him with the best attorneys and “expert” psychiatrists that money could buy. His defense was similar to that of your son’s, but it had a fancier name. He claimed to have been “involuntarily intoxicated,” and therefore had no recollection of how he entered my husband’s office and repeatedly stabbed him to death in front of several employees. He too had to be pulled off his victim before attempting to run away. During the trial, while his devoted family wiped tears from their eyes, the murderer stated, “If [my victim] were alive today, we’d probably be playing golf together.” He was equally as ignorant and unwilling to accept culpability as your son.

This family had ignored warning signs throughout his childhood, which was full of unaddressed violent outbursts. Perhaps if his parents had gotten him help and not DENIED that there was an anger problem, he might not have murdered an innocent man. Lucky for us, the judge gave him the equivalent of a life sentence with no parole, but that doesn’t help my family’s pain of not having a husband or father. 

So Dan, I hope this gives a mother’s perspective about actions and consequences. I’m not certain what role Brock’s mother played in raising him or her reactions to his sentencing, but your letter certainly explained your style of parenting. You talk about how shattered your lives have become since the verdict, even mentioning your son’s lack of interest in eating snacks after swimming. If you really want to help your son repair his life and learn to be a loving man and father someday, maybe do some self-exploration. Realize that being a “good” father means teaching decent values and taking responsibility, even if it causes one to lose his passion for pretzels.

Sincerely,

KarenLee Poter

 

Masturbation Challenge – MOUNT VESUVIUS HAS ERUPTED

  • Date: 5/22/16
  • Time: 1:20AM
  • Location: Shower
  • Duration: Unknown
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 1
  • Pass/Fail: WE DONE HERE

MOUNT VESUVIUS HAS ERUPTED! It was a very brief, but pleasurable. Slightly anti-climactic, but then again, what can live up to 21 days of blue balls? Lots more ejaculate than normal. My balls have still not shrunken down to normal size. My urine was a very neon yellow. This could be due to the ramen I ate tonight. GOOD NIGHT WORLD.

-zonked

P.S. On 5/24/16, two days after the Challenge, I timed how long it took me to ejaculate, trying to come as quickly as possible. This would act as a comparison point against the my time at the beginning of the challenge. I kept all conditions the same as in the initial test. No porn, but mental fantasy was allowed. No edging, I tried to come as quickly as possible. The hypothesis was that the challenge would decrease my penile sensitivity.

My time to ejaculation before the study was 2:00. My time to ejaculation after the study was 2:36. The difference could have been due to a variety of factors, such as tiredness and initial horniness. Upon reflection, I don't believe that this challenge made my penis any less sensitive. However, it certainly changed the way that I approach masturbation. Before the challenge, I wanted to come as quickly as possible. Today, I felt foolish trying to come without edging first. The orgasm is much more pleasurable when I take my time, and I can delay ejaculating much easier now that I have done the challenge. En fin, I believe the challenge has helped me grow in both my bodily control and appreciation for self-pleasure. It did not make my penis any less sensitive.

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 21 – MISSION ACCOMPLISHED

  • Date: 5/22/16
  • Time: 12:00AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 12:35
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 4
  • Pass/Fail: PASS!!!

WHOOP THERE IT IS! Not only did I complete the 21-Day Masturbation Challenge, but I finished in style! 12 minutes and 35 seconds, during which my mind rarely drifted from my bodily sensations. Moreover, I discovered a new way of masturbating that creates a much more intense sensation than my typical style*. I am incredibly happy that I participated in this challenge, and I am even happier that it is over. My blue balls need a vacation. Here are my main takeaways from the 21-Day Challenge:

  • Masturbation can be a form of meditation! The practice of repeatedly calling attention to penile sensations can increase physical self-exploration, relieve unnecessary mental chatter, and hone one's ability to focus. 
  • Not all masturbation techniques lead to the same result. Significantly different sensations can arise depending on the location and intensity of the physical contact. 
  • Porn and mental fantasies are not required to pleasure one's self. In fact, it can even be more pleasurable to focus on the acute sensations occurring within the body.
  • Holding in an orgasm is a lot like controlling an emotional response. For example, not that I do this a lot, but when I am not in a situation where it is appropriate to cry and I need to try to hold back my tears, I can effectively prevent myself from crying by locating the sadness in my body (usually in my neck and forehead) and breathing through the pain. This is exactly the same method for postponing ejaculation. 
  • Learning to control Kegel muscles is the answer to controlling orgasm. I just found this website that corroborates all my discoveries from the past 21 days! Look at the section called "Edging and Reverse Kegels." It's all about isolating and relaxing the muscles that are responsible for contracting and ultimately leading to ejaculation. Unbelievable!

This 21-Day Challenge has completely altered the way that I look at masturbation. When I began, I thought masturbation was an extremely boring, hedonistic activity meant for the sole purpose of reaching orgasm. Through practice, I've retrained myself to stave off orgasm and learned to enjoy the act of masturbating. I'm truly grateful for this practice and I believe that this will ultimately help prolong my sexual intercourse, which could potentially have large implications for my relationships and confidence. I intend to continue experimenting with edging, yet likely will choose to ejaculate every 3-7 days, as opposed to every 21. I could do without the dull, bloated ball pain and the ravenous libido that keeps me up at night.

If you participated in the challenge yourself, I hope you had an equally effective 21 days! Please leave a comment on our forum!  If you have been reading along, I appreciate the support and I hope this journey inspires you to explore your sexual prowess.

With a heart full of love,

CAMERON POTER

*To those interested, this new style of masturbation involves creating a ring with my forefinger and thumb and rubbing it slowly up and down the ring of my penis' head where the glans meets the shaft. TMI?

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 20 – Ready to Finish

  • Date: 5/21/16
  • Time: 12:29AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 6:58
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 5
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

This was the shortest time it's taken me to reach my edge. I attribute this to sleep deprivation and my incredible desire to go to bed. Last night I slept poorly for a few reasons, but mainly because I was sexually frustrated. I've been fantasizing about how I'm going to finally release on Sunday. Here are a few options I've been considering:

  • The traditional masturbation session, edging a few times to make sure that it's a full release. Likely would not use pornography, so that I can remain present with all my bodily sensations.
  • Contacting the woman that hit on me last night to see, on the off chance, if she's interested in helping me eliminate 21 days of built-up semen. Is that wrong? Maybe she'd be into that kind of thing? I'm sure some people are into that sort of thing. How do I bring that up?
  • Happy ending at massage parlor. This was my friend's idea. I've never considered getting a happy ending before, and the prospect of sex work is disturbing to me. However, part of me is considering finding an old masseuse who views happy endings as just a part of the massage. I was curious about how one goes about finding said masseuse, so I spent about half an hour on rubmaps.com (based on Christopher Smith Bryant's intel in Episode 18 of the podcast). It's quite shady and it seems like it's a big gamble. Still, it's on the table.

Tonight I watched A Dangerous Method, a movie about psychoanalysts, Freud and Jung. I was amazed by the sexual repression of their times. In fact, their societies were so sexually-repressed that Freud theorized that all neuroses stem from some sort of sexual repression. While most people believe him to be wrong these days, it still goes to show just how far we've come as a society. The fact that I can blog about my masturbation challenge and talk with my mother about sex on a weekly basis is just mind-blowing. I'm excited to see where this journey will lead.

With love,

Charleston Chew

 

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 19 – Ticking Time Bomb

  • Date: 5/20/16
  • Time: 1:09AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 9:34
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 4
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Oh my word. This is getting out of hand. The challenge is affecting my cognitive functioning. Here are a few things I've noticed:

  • I'm feeling way more energetic and alive. My friend said I was "glowing" tonight. I feel like I need to work out to get rid of this excess energy. I want to bite into something. Or fuck something. Anything.
  • I'm moving at a faster pace in general, but I'm making stupid mistakes. My attention to detail is a bit impaired. My ability to speak and formulate sentences has diminished. It takes me longer to get my point across. My mind seems a bit distracted.
  • I have an attractive neighbor. I haven't really noticed her before. I ran into her today and I have not been able to stop thinking about her. We ended up in the same elevator today. I was very close to asking her out. I still plan to. Oh my word.
  • I would fuck most things

Tonight I went to a friend's party, and this cute girl was hitting on me. When does that ever happen? I do NOT need this right now. There are two days left. This is crunch time. I was about to leave the party, I was saying goodbye, I thought I was in the clear, and she literally pulled me into a conversation with her friend where they were discussing the small of her back. She goes, "The small of my back is my best feature. I have a back valley. You have to touch it." Then she put my hand on the small of her back. I immediately grew erect. She held it there. I became nervous that she could see my pants moving, so I quickly evacuated. Another friend was watching and he knew about the masturbation challenge. On my way out, I asked him, "Why did she have to make me do that?!" He said, "I know! I thought you were going to explode!" I am truly living on the edge. 

Like the rest of today, tonight's masturbation session was a bit tenuous. I was getting a little cocky (pun INTENDED), and I decided to go for the fourth edge. When I felt it coming close, I involuntarily told my penis aloud, "No." It was too close for comfort. Thank god there are only two full days left of this challenge. I better make it. I WILL MAKE IT.

Tata for now,

Cartagena

 

 

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 18 – Kegels are Key!

  • Date: 5/19/16
  • Time: 1:19AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 9:18
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Phenomenal day. The majority of the day, I felt confident and present. This presence allowed me to see connections and coincidences occurring all around me, which made me feel tapped into the flow/chi/universe/great-one-spirit/whatchamacallit. E.g., I was buying a sandwich at a grocery store, when I saw a friend who I haven't seen in over a year. He was shocked to see me because just fifteen minutes prior, he received a text from his girlfriend asking for him to connect us. She's a producer and wants to talk about Sex Talk With My Mom! Hooray for friends' support!

Tonight's masturbation session went exceptionally well given this state of presence. I was highly aware of how to control my urges to climax and even teased myself by consciously slipping in some fantasizing. I'm now aware that when I feel myself reaching my edge, I can relax my Kegel muscles, and my penis will not contract. The contraction of these muscles is what leads me to orgasm, so when I relax them, I'm able to hold off on ejaculating. This is a huge breakthrough!

Growing physically and emotionally,

CammyBoyPoter

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 17 – Booyah!

  • Date: 5/18/16
  • Time: 12:45AM
  • Location: Bedroom (back in my apartment!)
  • Duration: 10:21
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 6
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Okay! I officially have blue balls. I'm experiencing an uncomfortable dullness in my ballsac, and it worsens with my masturbation. This is by far the largest/most-full my ballsac has ever been. It actually makes me feel quite virile and masculine. Like I'm pulsing with testosterone. On top of that, I have a much better sense for where my edge is and how to control it. Tonight I was able to regulate my penile contractions while imagining women. And I had much better mind control as to when I wanted to fantasize or just focus on my bodily sensations. So, overall, this practice has been an incredible growth experience (both emotionally and physically). That said, I could really use the relief of a wet dream.

Today was a day full of good fortune. I flew back to LA from Chicago, and each step of the way seemed to go smoother than the last. I succeeded at recording, editing, and releasing this week's "Quickie" episode. I took medication on the plane that warded off all potential sinus pain. At the last minute, two friends agreed to drive me from the airport to acting class and from the theater to home since I didn't have my car. And I had an educational and fun class! I wonder whether the excess testosterone coursing through my veins contributes to my increased productivity. Either way, phenomenal day!

Big love,

Cambo99 (my first AOL screen name)

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 16 – Accessing the Child Within

  • Date: 5/17/16
  • Time: 1:17AM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 7:12
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 5
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Today was the 10-year anniversary of my dad's death and also my last day at home. I spent the day sorting through the last remaining artifacts of my childhood and reminiscing with the family over home videos and favorite dad memories. It was a phenomenal reminder of the significance of family and relationships. Living so far away from my mother and brother, it's easy for me to forget the importance of these ties. As I watched these videos, I couldn't have been more grateful for the generosity and effort that my parents put forth in raising me and the love I shared with my siblings. I could see just how supported and free I was to be a happy-go-lucky child. Even the most mundane activity could become an adventure. I hope to return to that place of freedom and carefree one day. 

In an effort to live freely, I masturbated lying down tonight. How do you like that? Usually, I'm just standing in the middle of my room like a dipshit, but this time, I decided to recline. Slightly different experience, but overall very similar. Five more days (barring any missteps)!

Love,

Camdaham1@aol.com

P.S. My housekeeper/nanny/second mother told me today that when I was three, we were sitting on the beach and two pretty ladies in bikinis passed by us. I turned to her and asked her why my penis was getting big. I'm still waiting on the answer. 

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 15 – Are we there yet?!

  • Date: 5/16/16
  • Time: 1:57AM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 7:29
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

This is truly an endurance challenge. Not just in the sense that I'm trying to last longer, but also in the sense that every night I have to force myself to participate in this challenge. Over the past few nights, especially tonight, I've had zero desire to pleasure myself. I'm exhausted from my action-packed time at home, and I just want to sleep. However, the challenge continues on, and so I must choke my chicken.

Tonight's session was unusual. I had less control over my thoughts due to my sleep deprivation. My mind regularly wandered to thoughts of women, which made it much easier to find my edge. I tried to stay present with just my bodily sensations, but alas my fantasies got the best of me. Is anyone reading this? Penis, penis, penis. Sometimes I wonder whether this blog is secretly turning someone on. Probably not. I must sleep now. 

TTFN,

Dickboy Jr.

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 14 – Polyps

  • Date: 5/15/16
  • Time: 1:12AM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 10:28
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

These masturbation sessions have really become a form of meditation for me. Very similar to my typical Insight meditation practice, in which I sit silently and try to bring my attention to my breath, in this masturbatory practice, I sit silently and focus on my penis. In both practices, my mind will inevitably wander and I'll have to remind myself to attend to my bodily sensations. 

Tonight my mind kept wandering to this blog, a kind note that someone sent me today, and my post-nasal (bloody) drip, which is due to the vacuum sinusitis I referred to a few nights ago. I think I might have nasal polyps. If someone knows of a good ENT who specializes in sinuses in Los Angeles, please inform me. I need to to wake up in three hours for my brother's graduation. (Note: three hours is a hyperbole, but I'm definitely getting fewer hours of sleep than I require to maintain a rational mind.) 

Thank you kindly,

Maurice

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 13 – Discovery

  • Date: 5/14/16
  • Time: 12:53AM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 8:10
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Well, tonight was much better! I think I was in a much better state of mind since I slept a lot last night and had a very cathartic dinner with my mom. We had spent all day clearing out my closet. She helped me sort through all my old school work and awards that I had saved up since PRESCHOOL. (She's bombass dankass.) At one point she read through a second grade paper that I wrote about her and she started to cry. Seeing her cry made me tear up. I knew the feeling that she was experiencing and we discussed it. She was mourning the loss of second grade Cam. I felt helpless. There was no way to get him back. It somehow feels unfair that we can only see papers/pictures/videos from our past and not of our future. In other words, we can only see evidence of what we lost and nothing of what is to come. 

During tonight's masturbation session, I discovered a new area of sensation near the top of my penis, which is actually what brought me to my edge. It's amazing that I'm still discovering new parts of my penis despite having had it for 27 years. And no, it has nothing to do with my penis size. I guess discovery is the upside to not knowing what is to come!

With love,

Cameltoe

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 12 – Emotions + Body = Weird Bond

  • Date: 5/12/16
  • Time: 11:39PM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 16:34
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Realization: The duration of my masturbation is inversely correlated with my mental wellbeing. In other words, the worse my mental state, the longer I last. 

My mother sold our family home and is moving into an apartment in Downtown Chicago. I'm very excited for her, but this means that since being home, I have had to sort through all of my possessions and decide what to keep. I've also had to do the same with much of my (deceased) dad's old clothes and belongings. This is emotionally taxing. 

Moreover, we went to a local restaurant for dinner tonight, and the restaurant's owner stopped by our table to say hello. In the process, he shared his fondness and respect for my dad. I always enjoy hearing about the legacy that my father left behind, but this did not exactly put me in the mood to masturbate. So tonight, as I sat there trying to find my edge, the restaurant owner's words kept popping into my head. I thought I might never reach my edge. Eventually, I pushed through the sadness and pictured an attractive woman. I know Dr. Nancy said it's best to focus solely on my bodily sensations, but sixteen minutes is more than enough time for weiner yanking.

This whole experience tonight has really furthered my fascination with the relationship between body and emotion. In the past, I've noticed that fear/anxiety has a horrible effect on my GI tract, at one point constipating me to the point of hospitalization. Recently in my acting class, I struggled to express true sadness, and when I tried to force it out of me, I stopped being able to breathe and I just looked weird. It's very clear that tonight the sadness prevented me from reaching my edge until I ignored the emotion entirely. So, bottom line, emotions and the body are incredibly intertwined, and emotions are harder to control than they appear.

Hopefully in the future I'll be able to update you with a more profound insight. Those are the ramblings. Thank you for listening. PLEASE GIVE ME A WET DREAM.

Love,

Camp Odor

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 11 – Home Sweet Home

  • Date: 5/11/16
  • Time: 12:36AM
  • Location: Bedroom (of Family Home)
  • Duration: 15:44
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

If you're a frequent reader of this blog, you might notice that today was an aberration from the normal log entry. Most notably, I LASTED TWICE AS LONG. Now, there were many factors that led to this achievement, most of them were NOT. FUN.

To start, I currently feel as though there's an ice pick drilling into my left temple. This is due to the fact that I flew to Chicago today, and like all aspects of my being, my sinuses are extremely sensitive. The sudden pressure change upon descent was a disaster. So, while I was masturbating and becoming highly aware of my body, I was simultaneously growing more conscious of the striking pain in my forehead.

A perhaps larger obstacle to reaching my edge was the fact that I'm masturbating in my family's home, WHERE MY MOTHER RESIDES. Knowing that she is in the house is a major boner killer. Perhaps if she were unaware of this challenge and blog, I'd feel a little safer masturbating in her home. But since it's all out there, I feel like she can sense when I'm attacking my penis. I guess there is still a part of me that is ashamed and uncomfortable to acknowledge my masturbation habits in the presence of my mother. Somehow when I was back in California, her knowing that I was masturbating was much less of a concern.

If that is not enough, I am currently masturbating in my bedroom, which you'd think would be a safe, comfortable setting. However, upon my leaving for college, my mother converted my room into her YouTube recording studio. I literally had to move a camera and tripod to make space for tonight's masturbation session. At first, I was paranoid that somehow the camera was taping me. Then, I grew disturbed imagining how my mother records herself talking about sex just steps away from where I was masturbating. 

I was worried that I would not reach my edge without thinking of women, but eventually it came. It was very easy to control considering the urge arrived not like a tidal wave, but instead like a pond ripple. Overall, the session was much longer, but it was mainly due to physical pain and an uncomfortable environment. 

Here's to six more days of this Chi-town nonsense,

-Carl Jr.

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 10 – Boulders

  • Date: 5/11/16
  • Time: 12:55AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 8:38
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

What a phenomenal day! I spoke to two doctors – Dr. Nancy, the inspiration for this challenge, and Dr. Joel, a urologist who we interviewed for the podcast. I am so appreciative for both of their support in this endeavor. It always amazes me when people take time out of their busy schedules to listen to my masturbation concerns. They eased my anxieties related to prolonged blue balls and answered my questions related to fantasizing (FYI, it's okay to fantasize at the start of the session, but ideally the mind will be focused solely on the bodily sensations throughout the rest). I also learned from today's interview with Dr. Joel just how much I enjoy talking to people and listening to their stories. It is truly a gift when someone opens up and lets me in on their life. 

Regarding my masturbation session, it's still going strong. My balls are now officially boulders. This is likely the largest they've ever been. At one point today, I found myself in a weird/negative mood and I was wondering if the overgrown balls had something to do with it. I'll let you know if this becomes a trend. One thing of note: during the masturbation session, I actually impressed myself with my stamina and control. Probably six minutes in, I thought, "Look at me go!" Then, a sudden flash of a woman that I have a crush on popped into my head and I felt myself convulse; a reminder to not get too big for my britches (or lack thereof).

Dreaming of wet dreams,

Carlos Santana

 

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 9 – Risk & Gratitude

  • Date: 5/9/16
  • Time: 11:32PM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 8:57
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 5
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

Today I did something that I've been too afraid to do in the past; I posted to Facebook that I was searching for a job. When I job hunted in the past, I always wanted to keep my employment status private. I was ashamed to appear unemployed. Today, however, I woke up with the understanding that if I am going to get a job that I enjoy, I'm going to need my friends' help. It wouldn't be enough to send out just a few emails, I needed a whole lot of support. So, I posted a comedic, yet sincere status and lo and behold, I was overwhelmed with the likes, comments, and messages offering ideas and help. People from high school who I haven't spoken to in years were telling me about podcasting opportunities. Ex-girlfriends and hook-ups were offering to connect me with their comedy industry contacts. I put myself in a vulnerable position and I was awash in loving support. For that, I'm very grateful. I also recognize that I probably wouldn't have the guts to post the status in the first place if it weren't for this blog/podcast. By opening myself up to the public through STWMM, I've grown more comfortable with showing my weaknesses to the public. Very good. 

The masturbation session went well. However, my balls are as hard as rocks from all this buildup. I'm praying for a nocturnal emission tonight. Also, I'm curious to know how tantric practitioners claim to experience orgasms without ejaculating. I will research and report back.

As always, leave a comment on this post or on our forum! Would love to hear from you.

-Carlsbad

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 8 – I'm Not Alone!

  • Date: 5/9/16
  • Time: 12:07AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 7:29
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

That's right folks! While this might seem like a solo project, more and more people keep coming out of the woodwork to tell me about how this challenge has been affecting them. Just a couple of hours ago, someone told me that he's starting the challenge to spark his creativity. He believes that by not ejaculating, he can build up his sexual energy and (literal) creative power. I don't know where he got this idea from, but from my experience, he's probably right. I have not experienced the relaxed post-ejaculation stupor since the nocturnal emission. Moreover, with every passing day, I seem to grow more virile. Hooray!

Tonight, I also solidified a friendship with someone who had previously seen my blog / videos / writing / podcast and she STILL wanted to be friends! How wonderful is that? It's got me thinking that all this openness makes it much easier to determine who I should be spending time with. For example, the other night, during a clown performance, I asked a woman out on a date. She accepted and we talked after the show to nail down a plan. After the discussion, I could tell that we weren't really going to get along, but I still felt like I needed to go through with the date because I had asked her out. However! When I went to follow up on the date via Facebook Messenger (because I'm classy), she discovered my podcast / blog / videos / robust sex content and told me that we were not a good match. I was so relieved. I thanked her for her honesty and asked why. She explained that she was a Christian with a much more conservative approach to sex. She said she couldn't even read the description of my latest podcast episode. Hooray! Hooray!

The masturbation session was fine. I'm starting to incorporate fantasies because it's just boring otherwise. I have to say, my penis control is WAY stronger than when I started. When I feel myself reaching my edge, I can easily prevent myself from contracting and ejaculating. Hooray! Hooray! Hooray!

Goodnight,

Camembert

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 7 – Getting Weird

  • Date: 5/8/16
  • Time: 1:10AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 9:27
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

I can definitively say that this practice has desensitized me to at least one thing – discussing my masturbation. Recently I've found myself talking with my friends about this challenge, and a few times it's gotten to a place where I make them feel uncomfortable! Just tonight I was telling my best friend how my this challenge has raised my bodily awareness to the point where I now can control the opening and closing of my butt hole. He reacted probably as you are right now, in squeamish disgust. How I did not see this reaction coming, I do not know. I'm concerned for how I'll be speaking in the future, if this has only been one week.

It's getting harder and harder to get hard. Perhaps that's because these masturbation sessions are occurring later in the evening or when I'm really tired. I have been trying not to fantasize during these sessions. Dr. Nancy recommended that I start the challenge by just focusing on my bodily sensations without distracting myself with imagined visuals. I think for Week Two I'll venture into the visualizations a bit. I'll follow up with her first, but I think it'll make things a bit less boring. 

I must retire. I had a very long hour as a birthday Spider-Man today. The kids were jumping all over me (one kept slapping my ass), and I could barely see out of the spidey costume. It was like trying to corral a herd of cats in the dark. Needless to say, the face painting did not go over that well. One girl insisted that I paint her a second image because her first butterfly looked like a blob and her dad said she should ask for another. 

Over and out,

Picasso

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 6 – Spider-Man's a CockBlock

  • Date: 5/6/16
  • Time: 10:35PM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 9:34
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

This was a pathetic masturbation session. I'm exhausted from my camping trip and I'm extremely anxious about my first birthday party clown gig tomorrow. Needless to say, I was NOT in the mood. After a little coaxing/fantasizing, I eventually grew erect and could find the groove. But man, it is amazing how day-to-day stressors can shut down your libido.

It's mainly this birthday party I was hired to run tomorrow. I just got the details today, and there are many more curveballs than anticipated. 1) I have to go in a Spider-Man costume, which I can barely see out. I was told that I cannot remove the hood. 2) The party is not in the safest area of town. I worry about walking around the area in a Spider-Man costume, visually impaired. 3) It's for a four-year-old, which means that parents will likely be standing close by. I do not want to be scrutinized during my first party. My games, face painting, magic show, and balloon making are still a work in progress. I'll be practicing all day tomorrow. Wish me luck.

-Spidey

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 5 – THANK GOD FOR NOCTURNAL EMISSIONS!

  • Date: 5/5/16
  • Time: 8:27AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 13:19
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 3
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

THANK THE LORD/SAVIOR/ETERNAL CREATOR/WHOEVER THE HELL MADE WET DREAMS. Last night, I was at the end of my first REM sleep cycle, when suddenly there was an explosion. It was probably audible. I was not expecting this after only four days of the challenge, but boy am I grateful. The relief and relaxation that overcame me after ejaculating was unparalleled.

A few things to note...in the dream, I imagined myself performing oral sex on a woman, which I don't think is typical of my (infrequent) wet dreams. And when it came time to cum, I felt myself trying to edge and hold off from ejaculating, both in the dream and reality! This definitely was atypical. I could tell that my dreaming mind wanted to adhere to the 21-Day Challenge rules, which means that this might be becoming a habit! Very good! When I finally climaxed, there were many more penile contractions than I usually experience. I imagine that this is a result of the four days of pent up blue balls that I had stored.

This morning it was a bit more challenging to masturbate. I was not in the mood due to the early hour and the aforementioned depletion of my sexual energy. The edges were not of cliffs, but rather, of sidewalk curbs. I could barely fall off if I wanted to.

Anyway, I'm off to the wilderness. Thank god the nocturnal emission did not come tonight when I'll be sharing a tent with an age-old friend.

Best,

A Relaxed Cam

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy

Masturbation Challenge – Day 4 (Rd. 2) – Taming the Horse

  • Date: 5/5/16
  • Time: 12:01AM
  • Location: Bedroom
  • Duration: 11:01
  • # of Edges (Nearly climaxing and then backing away): 5
  • Pass/Fail: PASS

I've never tamed a horse before, but I imagine that this is what it must feel like. Like the wild horse, my penis wants nothing more than to break free. The mind control that this practice requires is staggering. One false move and this horse will be galloping his way to Day 1 again. Positive affirmations are now a requirement during the session. I find myself constantly repeating the phrase, "I am the master of my domain." 

Tomorrow I'm going camping with a long-time friend from high school who I haven't seen in years. Luckily it's only for one night, so I'll have time in private before and after the trip to continue the challenge. If it were any longer, I would have had to leave my old friend to hold down the tent as I masturbated in the cold wilderness. I'm grateful that it didn't come to this.

Over and out,

Cam the Crusader

Cameron Poter

@singlecamcomedy